Quixotic Perspectives

Too much sanity may be madness. And maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be!
- Don Quixote via Wikiquote

I have a friend who thinks I have misnamed this site. I don’t think she understands the reference and thinks its too obscure.

From the musical Man of la Mancha , “To dream an impossible dream,” and “Dulcinea ” are beautiful pieces of music. I’ve been able to see the whole musical once and have come across bits and pieces of it several times. I have also read a significant portion of the first book in Tobias Smollett’s translation, but haven’t gotten to the second book.

The thing I most admire about the story is its simultaneous simplicity and complexity. Much of Don Quixote’s actions are utter folly, but even so, he succeeds in changing the world around him. Over the course of the story, there is incredible movement in the characters, particularly in how the roles of Don Quixote and Sancho Panza flip.

Reality can change based on our perceptions. Sometimes by stretching our perceptions, we can achieve previously unimagined acts of beauty. I think some of the most rewarding times in our lives will be spent tilting at windmills.

If you’re not familiar with the story, you can read more about it at Wikipedia. If you’d like to go further, you can read the story online here. If you’re interested, I would definitely recommend seeing a musical version of the story.

In another life it seems, I majored in philosophy as an undergrad. In particular. I was drawn to 19th and 20th century continental existential and phenomenological thinkers. While there are many notable philosophers here, for me, Soren Kierkegaard stands out.

Before going further, let me note that I will make no claim to any great depth of philosophical study. In the course of my undergraduate work, rarely did we read texts cover-to-cover. Instead, we would read fragments, chapters or segments that would bring up key points, and then we would explore those thoughts.

I bring up Kierkegaard at this time for a couple of reasons: first for his use of pseudonymous authorship, and second for his rigorous pursuit of a self-defined authenticity toward his understanding of his own identity. Most scholars view each pseudonym to have a unique voice. Further, most do not believe that the aggregation of pseudonymous views could be compiled somehow to arrive at Kierkegaard’s personal views.

Regarding authenticity, Kierkegaard was a Christian who didn’t want his identity as Christian to be defined by church authorities with whom he disagreed. This desire went so far that he famously declared that he did not want to be buried in a church cemetery.

Johannes Climacus was the pseudonymous name Kierkegaard used in one of the texts I studied. As I recall from my studies of so long ago, Kierkegaard admonished others that his was a personal journey and we should not follow him. While I admire and would like to emulate the style, I do not want to duplicate his steps or reinterpret the meaning of his work for eternity. It evolves with the changing relationship of author and reader to the work over time through different experiences.

To represent personal changes in authorship perspectives, I will sometimes use the handle Impossible Dreamer, and other times J.C., in deference to Kierkegaard. Though I have a notion what each will represent, I expect that may also change over time.

J.C.

It’s about challenging my perceptions and assumptions. It’s about exploring the depths of my interests and probing the foundations on which I construct my reality. Through events and news of the world around me, at times through personal experiences, I want to probe and reflect upon how I develop my values. Feel free to follow my journey. If you care to join me or find here a space to begin your own self reflection, welcome.

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. — Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I attended one of the prestigious land-grant universities in the Midwest, studying philosophy and social studies education. One of the driving forces for me now is that I fell short of completing my degree. While I earned sufficient credits in pursuing a dual degree, I became burned out and did not complete some specific courses required in the two programs of study. From that experience, I now try to push myself to excel, but not so much that I overstretch my limits. While I try to continually push against and extend those limitations, I also try to be conscious of when the price is not worth the gain.

Since then, I studied massage therapy, and through massage became interested in Chinese medicine. Though I knew I ultimately wanted to study Chinese medicine, it was several years before I found myself in a position to pursue that desire. Taking that final plunge involved stepping away from a low-paying but secure job and committing to a lot of financial aid debt. I had not been able to manage a career sufficient to build any savings to take with me. With little safety net, I have now been studying Chinese medicine since April 2003 and have a little over a year remaining to my Masters degree. This doesn’t completely define me, but it is a sizeable component of who I am now.

There are additional bits and pieces that are significant. Though I have some leadership skills and a variety of talents, I can be socially challenged. Awkward even. I hope that I will be able to explore my difficulties in interpersonal relationships in an honest and open manner that also helps me grow.

I have a friend who, among other things, considers me tech support. Odd that, especially given that my formal computer training consists of one Intro to Computers and a single Access Database class at a community college a few years ago. Mostly I surf the web for news. But my dad is a computer tech, so I grew up around computers. I’m also patient and can read and make sense out of most instructions. That combined with how user friendly even Windows systems have become means that I can be reasonably technically proficient with patience and the right help files. Thus I get to be massage therapist as technical support. The renaissance-man/jack-of-all-trades thing went a bit far though, when she suggested I could be a fashion and design consultant. I mean, there has to be a limit, right?